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nobody
Joined: Mar 09, 2008
Posts: 1687
Location: Not here
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 Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 6:48 am Post subject:
Star Trek jokes
Subject description: Humour... the final frontier |
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What is the captain's favourite card trick? Piccard, any card.
Who does the captain invite on board to play games? Cardassians.
How does the crew of Voyager do it? The Janeway!
How does Janeway pay the Little Rascals for entertainment? With a Chak, otay?
What does the crew of the Enterprise like to do on shore leave? Kirk it with their homies.
What does Neelix say when he's feeling romantic? Kes me, you fool!
What was the son of the Enterprise's security chief accused of being? The boy who cried "Worf"!
What does Piccard say when he is not satisfied with the amount of information he's received? Insufficient, Data!
Where do prisoners of the Federation go? Riker's Island.
Who is the wrestling champion of the Federation? Dr. Crusher.
Why were people on DS9 holding their noses? There was a bad Odo.
Who provides the music for parties on DS9? Sisko!
Why did the quantum physicist visit DS9? He wanted to study the Quark.
What do people on DS9 drink during the holidays? Nog!
What was the commander of DS9 accused of? Telling bad Jakes.
Where do the crew of the Enterprise take their dull swords? To LaForge.
How far did the transporter chief of the Enterprise have to go to become chief engineer of DS9? Oh, Miles. |
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kkissinger
Stream Operator
Joined: Mar 28, 2006
Posts: 1430
Location: Kansas City, Mo USA
Audio files: 45
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| Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 8:18 am Post subject:
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Q: How is a Star Ship like toilet paper?
A: They circle Uranus looking for Klingons.
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-- Kevin
http://kevinkissinger.com |
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nobody
Joined: Mar 09, 2008
Posts: 1687
Location: Not here
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| Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 9:33 am Post subject:
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| That one's a classic. |
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kkissinger
Stream Operator
Joined: Mar 28, 2006
Posts: 1430
Location: Kansas City, Mo USA
Audio files: 45
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| Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 10:22 am Post subject:
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| audiodef wrote: | | That one's a classic. |
My eldest son (who is now 27 years old) told me that one probably about 17 years ago.
It is the only Star Trek joke I know.
I enjoyed your jokes, audiodef.
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-- Kevin
http://kevinkissinger.com |
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nobody
Joined: Mar 09, 2008
Posts: 1687
Location: Not here
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| Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 6:11 pm Post subject:
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Just wait til you've known me longer. You'll go from enjoying my jokes to groaning at them.
Don't worry, everyone does.  |
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Scott Stites
Janitor
Joined: Dec 23, 2005
Posts: 4127
Location: Mount Hope, KS USA
Audio files: 96
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| Posted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 7:33 pm Post subject:
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When I was a kid, I had a cassette copy of Star Drek I'd recorded off of Dr. Demento. It never failed to make me cackle when I listened to it. I miss that cassette.
http://www.tealdragon.net/humor/startrek/stardrek.htm
You'd have to hear it to get the full impact......
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nobody
Joined: Mar 09, 2008
Posts: 1687
Location: Not here
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| Posted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 7:49 am Post subject:
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That's hilarious!  |
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seraph
Editor
Joined: Jun 21, 2003
Posts: 12398
Location: Firenze, Italy
Audio files: 33
G2 patch files: 2
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| Posted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 10:07 am Post subject:
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I'd love to have that tape 
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| Quote: | | Don't die with your music still in you - Wayne Dyer |
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Danno Gee Ray
Joined: Sep 25, 2005
Posts: 1351
Location: Telford, PA USA
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| Posted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 3:03 pm Post subject:
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| I used to build radios with my Radio shack Experimentor's kit, (with springs and wires), hook them up to a longwire antenna I'd strung up in the back yard, and listen to Dr. Demento late at night like it was an illegal secret treasure... |
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glow worm
Joined: Nov 05, 2008
Posts: 150
Location: Petts Wood, Kent, UK
Audio files: 16
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| Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 4:58 am Post subject:
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How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
3 - a left ear, a right ear and a final, front ear. |
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jksuperstar
Joined: Aug 20, 2004
Posts: 2503
Location: Denver
Audio files: 1
G2 patch files: 18
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| Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 5:27 am Post subject:
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| Danno Gee Ray wrote: | | I used to build radios with my Radio shack Experimentor's kit, (with springs and wires), hook them up to a longwire antenna I'd strung up in the back yard, and listen to Dr. Demento late at night like it was an illegal secret treasure... |
The same box led me down this very dark electronic path However, I didn't have the pleasure of Dr Demento broadcasts to pick up! That may have led me in a completely different direction  |
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nobody
Joined: Mar 09, 2008
Posts: 1687
Location: Not here
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| Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2010 6:27 am Post subject:
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| glow worm wrote: | How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
3 - a left ear, a right ear and a final, front ear. |
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